The process of divorce is an emotional battle of attrition in and of its self. In this blog post we talk about the detriment anchoring has on your crucial decision making and provide some examples to help you recognize such and keep your focus and efforts in the right path to the extent the end result offers you a plan that you can manage post divorce. You may not know it yet, but boy was that a mouthful.
Understanding the Anchoring Effect:
Anchoring is defined by the Daily Blog by Harvard law as a cognitive bias that describes the tendency for individuals to rely heavily on the first piece of information they receive (the anchor) when making decisions, even if that information is irrelevant or inaccurate. In layman’s terms, having inaccurate expectations derived from your emotions or sought from a source that doesn’t accurately support your desired fact as it relates to your specific situation. Now that is my paraphrase of the definition and probably derived from my experiences working with divorce clients as a mortgage loan officer.
Examples of Anchoring Effect in Divorce:
Remember, a challenge looks different from your prospective in a divorce vs someone from “the outside looking in”. Probably the most common situation we see as a loan officer helping divorce clients is when emotions are so strong, and memories are so vivid as it relates to the house where a family grew. Sometimes the only thing the divorcing spouses can agree on is that they want their children to stay in the house they grew up in. The children have neighbor friends there, and maybe the one babysitter the parents ever trusted lives right next door. These are all emotional factors that definitely play a role on why you might want to keep the house, but they can not be factors that blur the reality of facts that have to be taken into account first. Here is a case study example below from Jody Bruns, Owner and Founder of The Divorce Lending Association:
Negative Byproduct of Anchoring: Communication Barriers:
When you have “anchored” on something in the process of a divorce process and haven’t learned a fact from a reliable source, especially if the source was emotionally derived, you actually put up a communication barrier between you and the legitimate source that can give you factual information.
In the Divorce Lending Association blog, Divorce Mediation: Keeping the Marital Home, you get a prospective more specific to how anchoring can influence mediation.
Mitigating the Anchoring Effect:
Discover actionable strategies to counteract the anchoring effect in divorce proceedings. From seeking professional guidance to focusing on underlying interests, make a conscious effort in fostering constructive dialogue and reach mutually beneficial resolutions. In conclusion, the anchoring effect presents significant challenges in the divorce process, but awareness and strategic interventions can mitigate its negative impacts. By addressing this cognitive bias head-on, divorcing couples can navigate the complexities of separation with greater fairness and understanding.
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